According to current Florida law you can get a gun, follow an unarmed minor, call the police, have them explicitly tell you to stop following [the minor] and choose to ignore that, keep following the minor, get into a confrontation with them, and if at any point during that process you get scared you can shoot the minor to death, and the state of Florida will say, 'Well, look: you did what you could.'

Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath.

There are some people who watch NASCAR for the highly skilled driving - but most people watch it for the crashes.

It really helps a comedian to be an outsider.

I'm not really much of an actor, so when I started on 'The Daily Show', I was just trying to adopt the faux authority of a newsperson.

Ads are baked into content like chocolate chips into a cookie. Except, it’s actually more like raisins into a cookie - because nobody f-‍-‍-ing wants them there.

You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.