If you owe fifty dollars you're a piker; if you owe fifty thousand dollars you're a businessman; if you owe fifty million dollars you're a tycoon; if you owe fifty billion dollars you're the government.

One antidote for sexual truancy lies in simply teaching youth the wonder, the miracle, the reverence for the creation of life itself. Life is a divine creation. You don't take chances with creation.

Happiness is a by-product. You cannot pursue it by itself.

When I was a boy I used to do what my father wanted. Now I have to do what my boy wants. My problem is: When am I going to do what I want?

Give your child a spanking once a day. If you don't know why, he does.

Many wise words are spoken in jest, but they don't compare with the number of stupid words spoken in earnest.

Life begins at forty, but so does arthritis, and the habit of telling the same story three times to the same person.