Robert A. Heinlein Quotes

Age is not an accomplishment, and youth is not a sin.

There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick.

Everything is theoretically impossible, until it is done.

Belief gets in the way of learning.

But, do you know, once you get used to it's rather cute. I mean, if a girl looks alright to start with, she still looks alright with her head smooth.

The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship.

Neither individuals nor corporations have any right to come into court and ask that the clock of history be stopped, or turned back.

Coffee comes in five descending stages: Coffee, Java, Jamoke, Joe, and Carbon Remover.

Heinlein's Rules for Writers Rule One: You Must Write Rule Two: Finish What Your Start Rule Three: You Must Refrain From Rewriting, Except to Editorial Order Rule Four: You Must Put Your Story on the Market Rule Five: You Must Keep it on the Market until it has Sold

He's an honest politician--he stays bought.

When I don’t understand, I have an unbearable itch to know why.

By the data to date, there is only one animal in the Galaxy dangerous to man -- man himself. So he must supply his own indispensable competition. He has no enemy to help him.

Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best, he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear his shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house.

Cheops' Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.

I believe in my neighbors. I know their faults and I know that their virtues far outweigh their faults.

Since survival is the sine qua non, I now define the "moral behavior" as "behavior that tends toward survival".

To permit irresponsible authority is to sell disaster.

To stay young requires unceasing cultivation of the ability to unlearn old falsehoods.

...a book need never die and should not be killed; books were the immortal part of man.

There is no such thing as 'social gambling.' Either you are there to cut the other bloke's heart out and eat it -- or you're a sucker. If you don't like this choice -- don't gamble.

The correct way to punctuate a sentence that states: "Of course it is none of my business, but -- " is to place a period after the word "but." Don't use excessive force in supplying such a moron with a period. Cutting his throat is only a momentary pleasure and is bound to get you talked about.

It's up to the artist to use language that can be understood, not hide it in some private code. Most of these jokers don't even want to use language you and I know or can learn . . . they would rather sneer at us and be smug, because we 'fail' to see what they are driving at. If indeed they are driving at anything--obscurity is usually the refuge of incompetence.

Behind every mystery lies another mystery.

Must be yearning deep in human heart to stop other people from doing as they please.

History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.

A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.

Always store beer in a dark place.

I was not offended, my love. An insult is like a drink; it affects one only if accepted. And pride is too heavy baggage for my journey.

God is omnipotent, omniscient, and omnibenevolent - it says so right here on the label. If you have a mind capable of believing all three of these attributes simultaneously, I have a wonderful bargain for you. No checks, please. Cash and in small bills.

There is solemn satisfaction in doing the best you can for eight billion people. Perhaps their lives have no cosmic significance, but they have feelings. They can hurt.

A "critic" is a man who creates nothing.

Gratitude is a euphemism for resentment.

Any government will work if authority and responsibility are equal and coordinate. This does not insure “good” government, it simply insures that it will work. But such governments are rare — most people want to run things, but want no part of the blame. This used to be called the “backseat driver” syndrome.

Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly.

All cats are not gray after midnight.

The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance.

Being right too soon is socially unacceptable.

If an elderly respected expert in a given field tells you that something can be done he is almost certainly right. If an elderly respected expert in a given field tells you that something is impossible, he is almost certainly wrong.

Customs tell a man who he is, where he belongs, what he must do. Better illogical customs than none; men cannot live together without them.

The Ten Commandments are for lame brains. The first five are solely for the benefit of the priests and the powers that be; the second five are half truths, neither complete nor adequate.

Decency is not news; it is buried in the obituaries - but it is a force stronger than crime.

Working because you want to is the best sort of play.

Does history record any case in which the majority was right?

Most 'scientists' are bottle washers and button sorters.

I took up writing because I needed money. And I continued to write because it's safer than stealing and easier than working.

Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.

Anything free costs twice as much in the long run or turns out worthless.

The most noble fate a man can endure is to place his own mortal body between his loved home and the war's desolation.