Russell Brand Quotes

The Holy Spirit ain't got a pen.

It was crushingly disappointing as a fan of The Simpsons to discover that it's just you in a room speaking into a microphone. I thought I was going to become friends with Homer Simpson, but unfortunately none of them are real.

Drugs and alcohol are not my problem, reality is my problem, drugs and alcohol are my solution.

Rebel children, I urge you, fight the turgid slick of conformity with which they seek to smother your glory.

When you're married, it's one person. That's one more than a monk. It's not that different.

If you've got any concern at all about animal welfare, you've got to not eat meat.

Turns out it was mostly a lie. But, at least for a short while, it was a beautiful one.

Everyone has their own mantra.

A buddy of mine was addicted to heroin and he told me that people who say quitting cigarettes is harder than quitting heroin are wrong.

A personality for the incredibly beautiful can be a pointless cargo.

Consciousness exists beyond your head, between our heads, and it can manifest harmony.

A Halloween-haired, Sachsgate-enacting, estuary-whining, glitter-lacquered, priapic berk How dare I, from my velvet chaise longue, in my Hollywood home like Kubla Khan, drag my limbs from my harem to moan about the system? A system that has posited me on a lilo made of thighs in an ocean filled with honey and foie gras'd my Essex arse with undue praise and money.

The only Revolution that can really change the world is the one in your own consciousness, and mine has already begun.

Be led by your talent, not by your self-loathing; those other things you just have to manage.

It would have been convenient to be gay. Just because of the grooming, the narcissism, stuff like that. But I have this kind of roaring heterosexuality. Traditional, uncomplicated heterosexuality, an almost cliched Robin Askwith thing.

People don't realize that the future is just now, but later.

I do transcendental meditation, which is, I suppose, derived from Vedic or Ayurvedic principles, which is sort of Hindu principles.

Addiction is a serious desease; it will end with jail, mental institutions or death.

If you're a drug addict, then you've always got drugs, so you're a criminal. So you're gonna get into problems.

Life’s never a postcard of life, is it? It never feels like how you’d want it to look.

Sometimes, as a comedian, a line will come to you, that is so beautiful, so perfect, that you think: I did not create this line. This line belongs to all of us. Surely this is a line of God

I get fixated when I'm bleeding -- I can see why they went in for blood-letting in the medieval times because it makes you feel a bit better. When I cut myself, the drama of it calms me down.

Sometimes when we're incensed by the rancid tide of injustice, the impulse is to attack. We must avoid this. We have learned that violence as a means is always unsuccessful.

The happiest moments in our life aren't "Oh I got a new hat or a wonderful silvery object, some glistening bauble." But it's when you connect with another human being. If you can find the $18 in your pocket, you are purchasing dreams with that money.

The bad-boy label is just an assumption.

On respect for the Queen: When I lick a stamp I always do it with my eyes closed.

When I was growing up, I thought I'd be a lot happier if I was famous and successful and if I had money.

Anyone who's been poor and gets rich is stalked by guilt and fear. Guilt because you know it isn't fair, that life hasn't changed for everyone

Im happy to be a part of the conversation, if more young people are talking about fracking instead of twerking were heading in the right direction. The people that govern us dont want an active population who are politically engaged, they want passive consumers distracted by the spectacle of which I accept I am a part.

Fear travels fast. Love travels a little more slowly. Rationale takes a little more consideration.

I don't get my authority from this preexisting paradigm which is quite narrow and only serves a few people. I look elsewhere for alternatives that might be of service to humanity.

People have always said, are you gay? I've had a lot of that. But it's just not in me. I really like women a lot; I'm repulsed by men sexually.

This is no time for drinking a mug of water - which you would do nowhere else in the world. A mug of water! You just don't drink water from mugs, do ya? Except on the telly. Water out of a mug! Should be a hot drink... mug of water.

If people have some sort of yearning, dissatisfaction or some itching irritability, then it might because they aren't looking in the right direction for a solution. They aren't looking within.

Managing wildlife? It's wild! It don't need managing, leave it alone.

God is in the mountains. Impassive, immovable, jagged giants, separating the celestial from the terrestrial with eternal diagonal certainty. As if silently monitoring the beating heart of the creator from the universe's perfect birth. Stood in the thin air and the awe, one inhales God, involuntarily acknowledging that we are but fragments of a whole, a higher thing. The mountains remind me of my place, as a servant to truth and wonder. Yes, God is in the mountains. Perhaps the pulpit too and even in the piety of an atheist's sigh. I don't know; but I feel him in the mountains.

I do have a regard for the musicality of language that came from BBC sitcoms like 'Fawlty Towers.'

Since Steve Jobs died I cannot bear to see anyone use an iPhone irreverently, what I did was a tribute to his memory.

Total revolution of consciousness and our entire social, political and economic system is what interests me, but that's not on the ballot.

It's no wonder Bob Geldof knows so much about famine - he's been dining out on I Don't Like Mondays for 30 years.

I didn't cross the line, you drew it in after I traversed it.

The utilities and facilities of major corporations can be confiscated and given to democratic collectives

I regret that I didn’t realize that actually they’ve got no power over you at school — it’s all just a trick to indoctrinate you into being a conditioned, tame, placid citizen. Rebel, children, I urge you, fight the turgid slick of conformity with which they seek to smother your glory.

My mum brought me up on her own. All we really had was each other.

The one measure of true love is: you can insult the other. --Slavoj Zizek

I don't know if this is the kind of retrospective analysis that people are fond of applying to their work or actions, but it feels like I knew I was going to be famous and I knew that an element of that would be traumatic, so that if I could make myself something big and otherworldly, it would be a kind of defence.

Honesty has always been an integral part of my operation, really.

I've been wanting to tell people my theory about what goes on after time. It's beyond our consciousness. We get glimpses of it between the infrared and the ultraviolet - the narrow narrow corridor of light that we are able to perceive.