Jerry Stiller Quotes

Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made the movie.

I shave without using shaving cream.

The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent.

It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures.

Would you go to see a brilliant actor who's been framed for something that he didn't do, and put him on a stage and say he's going to do Hamlet for you, and why don't you enjoy it? That's a hell of an analogy, but it's about the same thing.

My father and mother. I figured if I could make them laugh, they'd stop fighting. I stole all their material.

We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together.

Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer's.

During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.

We are even better looking on the small screen

Some of the routines come back very easily. We do it off the top of our heads.

I've been around the block a lot and I've had a merry trail for 55 years.

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny.

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way.

I loved the idea of touching base with an audience.

Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field.

I've got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories.