Robin Williams Quotes

Things that I see in the future. I see... it could be quite incredible if we can master a few problems, like the air and the water thing might be nice. I see governments dissolving these barriers are all falling down for economic reasons. They're all so interbound.

Along with the Oscars, the Academy is giving out a green card.

Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time...

It's a wonderful feeling when your father becomes not a god but a man to you - when he comes down from the mountain and you see he's this man with weaknesses. And you love him as this whole being, not as a figurehead.

My first day as a woman and I am already having hot flushes

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut.

When you really do find a new idea or you're in and it's all working, that's the gift. It's like a musician when they hit a riff, that's when you're like all right, it's mellow. You back off and just ride it.

Being in the same room with people and creating something together is a good thing.

Our job is improving the quality of life, not just delaying death.

If heaven exists, to know that there's laughs, that would be a great thing.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

I do believe in love; it's wonderful - especially love third time around, it's even more precious; it's kind of amazing.

Be prepared for luck.

I can see it now: Osama bin Laden goes up to the pearly gates where George Washington comes out, starts beating him and is then joined by 70 other members of the Continental Congress. Osama will say, Hey, wait! Where are my 71 virgins? And George will reply It's 71 Virginians, you asshole!

For a while you get mad, then you get over it.

You're still young. Being a true loser takes years of inaptitude

Women have so many levels. There's the physical level, which is a lot of fun. There's this emotional level, which is extremely mercurial.

There's three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular basis, and a navy blazer.

I've actually gone to the zoo and had monkeys shout to me from their cages, "I'm in here when you're walking around like that?"

I thought I was fooling people. But it's the old thing of 'they say vodka doesn't smell'. No, not until you sweat. And you just lie and lie and you think 'I can deal with this'. And then you finally go, 'No you can't'. And then you give up.

If there was a pill that allowed you to drink and not get drunk, an alcoholic would go "What happens if you take two?"

Freud: If it's not one thing, it's your mother

When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a lifeline?'

Never go to Pluto, it's a Mickey Mouse planet.

My father retired to San Francisco, and I got a chance to know him and be around him. It's always been someplace where everything changed for the better. It's always been a home for me.

Comedy pays the bills if I can't find a film.

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'

I had one or two steady girlfriends in high school, but then in college, it was three, four... I went crazy. At one point I had three separate girlfriends, running around mad.

It never fails - you get in the bath and there's a rub at the lamp

Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget.

We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race.

The first time I ate organic whole-grain bread I swear it tasted like roofing material.

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you'll win, no matter what the outcome.

I'm a very tolerant man, except when it comes to holding a grudge.

You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren't paying attention to.

I was an only child. I did have kind of like a lonely existence.

Mr. Keating: Carpe Diem! Sieze the day!

My childhood was really nice. My parents never forced me to do anything; it was always, "If you want to do that, fine." When I told my father I was going to be an actor, he said, "Fine, but study welding just in case."

Look at the walls of Pompeii. That's what got the internet started.

I never performed on drugs. That'd be stupid. It's the same thing with athletes. They can't perform when they have cocaine problems.

A human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.

Incoming is not the thing you want to hear at Christmas.

To be acknowledged for who and what I am, no more, no less. Not for acclaim, not for approval, but, the simple truth of that recognition. This has been the elemental drive of my existence, and it must be achieved, if I am to live or die with dignity.

Crying never helped anybody do anything, okay? You have a problem, you face it like a man.

Beer commercials usually show big men, manly men, doing manly things: "You've just killed a small animal. It's time for a light beer." Why not have a realistic beer commercial, with a realistic thing about beer, where someone goes, "It's 5:00 in the morning. You've just pissed on a dumpster. It's Miller time."

In down times I do things like go for a long bike ride or run. The other thing I'm doing in that quiet time is just observing.

I'm fascinated by the new iPhone. I bought it and kept trying to use it in France. "Siri, what is a good restaurant?" (In a robotic voice.) "I'm sorry, Robin. I can't give locations in France." "Why, Siri?" "I don't know." It's like she was upset with the French or something. "They seem to have an attitude I can't understand. Should I look for Germans, Robin?"